Good morning everyone!! This morning I woke early, to a dark, grey, rainy day in London; so I crept back under the duvet and lay listening to the raindrops on the window pane, and the melodious percussion played on the leaves of the nearby trees. Today the rain suits me; I’m disappointed, more than I can bear to admit to myself, so the rain feels like an excuse for the melancholy that hangs like a mist, and the drumming a reason to ache, without looking too closely at the bruises of my heart. So I lay for a while, focusing on the weather rather than my emotional climate, and drifted away into sweet oblivion, as sleep reclaimed me.
I dreamt of a walk on the beach, watching the waves searching for answers, and as they rolled towards me, again and again, the truths were insistent despite my insecurity that clings to reason and logic. So I waded in, trusting my intuition and swam through those feelings, that I can’t escape, at least for the moment, as hope keeps me afloat. When I woke again, imagery from my dream slipped though my thoughts like sand falling through fingers, but the hope remained, quiet and small, but resolute. I lay for a while, letting go of expectation, and sent love to those I care about, before stretching my full length and getting up for coffee.
The rain has ceased, and as I sit on the awesome sofa with my latte, I acknowledge the process, a change in direction. Often life doesn’t work out the way we want it to, and we can feel let down and hurt by people we care about; but time and time again I’ve found that the disappointments have displaced me from the paths I chose, onto the right one. So this morning I’m practicing patience, and focusing on faith, letting life guide me, one step at a time, into my internal sunshine again. I hope you’re having a beautiful weekend. Blessings & love, Hxx